Fort Worth residents can finally get a taste of real uptown Dallas Bar-B-Q when a new location opens in the East of 7th development on April 1. The restaurant has won rave reviews from Hipper-Than-U Magazine and the website Trendier-Than-Thou.
Dallas Bar-B-Q is known for its non-smoky flavor and tough, quickly-cooked meat.
“Fort Worthians have been having to drive 36 miles east to get a taste of Dallas Bar-B-Q but now they have it right at the end of their sterling silver forks right in what-do-you-call-it? Steertown? Heifferhome?, something like that,” said Chef T. O. Snooty. “More than that they can have their favorite Dallas Bar-B-Q on elegant white linens, dining by candlelight and sipping some of the finest French wines.”
Snooty says Dallas Bar-B-Q will offer some specialties that can’t currently be found in Fort Worth.
“We’re going to serve our famous tofu barbecue, which is real popular over here in Big D, little A, double L, A-S, particularly in Uptown, Addison, Highland Park and Plano, ” said Snooty. Snooty also noted that the restaurant uses only fine white pine to cook its meats and tofu, not that “nasty” mesquite wood.
Music will also be a big component of the restaurant. “We’re going to have Trance Music Night, Disco Night and Tortured Souls Folk Music Taylor Guitar Night. We’re thinking of adding a You Tube music sensation night, where we’ll have people do Karoke of Rebecca Black’s ‘Friday’ all night long. That’s proven real popular in our Highland Park restaurant.”
Snooty said like many restaurant, Dallas Bar-B-Q plans to work with local sports teams.
“We’re working a deal for sponsorship of the Euless Secretarial School Badminton team. Those ladies have won state three years running, would have won four save for a couple of severe eyelash and fingernail injuries,” said Snooty. “We’re going to work our way into the social fabric of Forth Worth, I mean Fort Worth.”
Snooty then said something shocking: “April Fool!”